WithuinMind
Mental health information for children and young people
Welcome
Thank you for choosing to visit the website of Pennine Care Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services. This site is intended to provide helpful information for young people from the Pennine Care NHS Foundation Trust areas of Stockport, Tameside & Glossop, Oldham, Rochdale and Bury.
If you live outside of these areas you may still find the website helpful however, please contact your local health services if you have specific needs or questions related to your health, wellbeing or safety. Thank you.
About mental health
What is mental health?
Mental health is how we think, feel and act as we cope with our life. It is also about how we look at ourselves and other people in our lives. Our mental health also influences how we handle stress, relationships and making choices.
What's a mental health difficulty?
One in four people experience mental health difficulties during their lifetime and most people get over these quickly and feel better. Mental health problems are usually reactions to traumatic and stressful events, such as experiencing difficulties in families, relationships and school or college. Using drugs and alcohol abuse can also cause mental health problems.
How do I know if I have a mental health difficulty?
Mental health difficulties can show themselves in lots of different ways. Feelings of worry, anxiety, sadness and stress are all normal emotions that everyone experiences sometimes. However, if these feelings don't go away and start to affect your life, then they might be a sign of a mental health problem.
These are some possible signs that you might be having a problem with your mental health:
- Struggling more than usual in school, college or work
- Feeling like all your energy has gone
- Feeling like you don't want to do things that you used to enjoy
- Getting angry over little things or feeling more moody than usual
- Having trouble sleeping
- Misusing drugs and alcohol
- Losing or gaining lots of weight
- Hearing and seeing things that confuse or scare you, that others do not see
- Feeling paranoid, like others are watching you, laughing at you or out to get you
If you think you are experiencing mental health difficulties, you need to tell someone about your problems. This might feel like a very difficult thing to do, but the sooner you talk to someone and address your problems, the more chance there is of making a full recovery and avoid more problems in the future.
Please visit the Getting Help page for more information.
Attitudes to mental health
There are lots of successful and famous people that have experienced mental health difficulties, such as: Winston Churchill, Robbie Williams, Britney Spears, Einstein, Vincent Van Gough and Stephen Fry.
Mental health difficulties can affect anyone, regardless of their age, race, intelligence, confidence or how they look. Unfortunately, there can be a 'stigma' attached to mental health difficulties. Stigma can mean that people don't want others to know about their problems, and because of this, we often don't realise how many other people we know have experienced similar problems to us. In actual fact, one in every four of us will experience a mental health difficulty at some point in our life!
Mental health difficulties usually happen when people have been exposed to troubling situations, such as the breakdown of a relationship, a difficult childhood, the loss of a loved one or being bullied and picked on. Because of this, it is better to think about mental health difficulties as an understandable reaction to a difficult environment, rather than a sign of personal weakness! Even when mental health difficulties occur without any obvious environmental cause, there is still normally a reason for it - it is not your fault!
Staying mentally healthy
Staying mentally healthy is something that can have a positive impact on the rest of your life and something we all need to think about and work at. There are many things you can do to help you feel well. These include:
Eating well: There is evidence that the foods we eat can influence the way we feel. Certain foods, especially fatty, salty and processed foods can make you feel tired and lacking in energy, whereas a diet with lots of fresh food can give you more energy and help brighten your mood. Eating simple meals cooked with fresh ingredients, instead of too many burgers, pizzas and kebabs will give you a healthy body and a healthy mind.
Getting exercise: Light exercise, even just going for a brisk walk, can be an important way to stay mentally healthy. When we exercise, our brains release chemicals that fend off low moods and help us feel brighter. It is also a good way to reduce stress and tension.
Doing things you enjoy: It can sometimes feel difficult to do enjoyable things when we are feeling low, but when we do things we enjoy our brains release 'feel good' chemicals. These reduce feelings of low mood and anxiety, and help you to feel good about yourself and your life in general. The more time you spend doing enjoyable things, the less time there is for negative feelings and thoughts.
Talking to someone you can trust: Talking to someone you trust about your problems can be the single most important thing you can do for your mental health. Talking about problems for the first time can be a big relief, and problems normally don't feel as powerful when they are shared with someone else. People can also help you think about what you can do to change your situation. If you don't have a friend, relative or teacher you want to talk to, phoning a helpline or speaking to a counsellor or therapist can be very helpful as these people are professionals with expertise in helping people deal with their mental health problems. Please visit the Getting Help page for useful helpline numbers.
Dealing with stress: Stress is a major cause of mental health problems, so finding a good way to deal with it can be one way of staying well. Why not try some of these top ways for beating stress, as voted for by other young people:
Top ten ways to beat stress (voted for by young people!):
- Write poems and songs
- Think of things you would like to do in the future
- Picture a place in your mind that you would like to visit that would make you feel happy
- Go to the gym and do your best so that you feel stronger inside and out
- Paint/draw/sketch/or play an instrument
- Use a punch bag or pillow to hit
- Hug or scream into a cushion
- Listen to music. Listen to the lyrics that you can relate to - it helps express yourself and get it all out
- Talk to someone you trust about how you feel or just talk to people about something else so you don't feel lonely
- Squeeze an ice cube or have a shower
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For children
How are you feeling?
Feelings change. Sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly.
When we feel happy, it feels good and we usually want to have that feeling all the time.
Everyone feels sad, scared or angry sometimes.
Click on a feeling to find out more.
Happy
Things which can help you feel happy:
- Singing
- Playing games
- Being with friends
- Playing with a pet
- Dancing
- Drawing
- Sport
- Music
What makes you happy?
Sad
Lots of things can make us feel sad. Sometimes we feel sad for no reason at all. Sometimes we feel sad and remember other things and end up feeling even worse!
It can feel like you'll feel sad for ever.
But things do change.
Lots of things make us feel sad.
Maybe…
- Someone has hurt your feelings
- Someone has been unfair
- A friend has told you they don't want to be friends any more
- Someone you loved has died
Usually people don't feel sad for too long. Things feel better, friends or family cheer us up, or we do something that takes our mind off it.
Even when something big goes wrong, we have times when we feel better, in between the sad times.
What makes you happy?Sometimes none of these things seem to work and our sad feelings follow us around everywhere.
If you feel like that, it's important to tell someone.
Talking can help.
Who can you talk to?
- Someone in your family
- Someone you feel safe and ok with
- Someone who has a job helping children with their feelings
- A teacher
- A dinner lady
- School nurse
- Youth worker
Whatever you choose to do, remember things will change!
Scared or worried
We all feel worried or scared sometimes.
Sometimes it's understandable.
Sometimes it can be because you were scared by something when you were younger or even by your imagination!
Maybe you worry about…..
- Going to a new school
- Moving house
- Someone hurting you or bullying you
- The dark
- Thunderstorms
Lots of feelings come with being worried or scared:
- Wanting to run away
- Feeling frozen to the spot
- Tummy ache
- Feeling like you can't breathe properly
You can get help with feelings of being scared or worried.
What helps?
- Draw your worries on a piece of paper (sometimes it doesn't look so scary when it's drawn)
- Keep a diary
- Talk to someone
Who can you talk to?
- Someone in your family
- Someone you feel safe with
- Someone who has a job helping children with their feelings
Angry
We all feel angry sometimes.
It's right to be angry if someone hurts us or treats us unfairly.
Anger can help us do something about a situation which is wrong.
The important thing about anger is how we manage it.
How can we stay in charge of anger and not let it be in charge of us?
Lots of feelings can come in our bodies when we're feeling angry:
- Feeling like you're going to explode
- Headaches
- Seeing red
- Tummy ache
Knowing how to behave when you're still angry is hard. Thinking when you're angry is hard.
Anger can get us to:
- Make the wrong choices
- Hurt other people
- Do things that get us into trouble
What helps?
- Calm down (What helps you to calm down?)
- Tell someone what's made you angry
- Go for a walk
- Sport
- Read a book
- Listen to music
- Hold your wrists under cold running water and close your eyes for a while
- Shout into your pillow and then lie down for a bit
Talking to someone can help you calm down quicker so you can think clearly about what to do about the thing that made you angry in the first place.
Who can you talk to?
- Someone in your family
- Someone you feel safe with
- Someone who has a job helping children with their feelings
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For young people
How is it for you?
Being a young person can be really hard sometimes. There can be a lot of pressure to do well at school or college, to fit in and be liked by other young people and choosing your future. Everything is new to you and the decisions and choices you have to make can be overwhelming, for example managing your money, moving away from home, your sexuality, boyfriends/girlfriends and exams. All this can feel confusing and like a roller-coaster with ups and downs, twists and turns and things happening so fast. Your feelings about yourself and other people can change so quickly too, one minute you may be laughing so hard you cry, the next you may feel so down that you're crying with sadness. It might feel like the adults around you don't understand how you think and feel and that sometimes they want you to be an adult and other times treat you like a child with lots of rules that feel pointless. To feel like this is normal and most other young people will feel like this at times too. Sometimes these feelings can stay around for too long and they might stop you doing the things you normally do with your family and friends, this is when you need to do something to make yourself feel better.
Click on the next few sections to find out more about the common issues for young people.
If you or somebody you know has thoughts about wanting to be dead this is an emergency please get help from your GP or attend your nearest accident and emergency department.
Feeling worried or stressed?
This page contains some information on how to help, for more information please visit the Getting Help page.
When you worry a lot about something it means you are stressed or you're stressed out. Lots of things can cause stress, for example school pressure, being bullied, family problems or when you lose someone you love. Sometimes we don't even know why we are stressed or can feel stressed when we have lots of happy things happening in our lives. When we are stressed it can really effect how we feel both in our bodies and in our heads.
Signs of being stressed are:
- Having a headache or upset stomach
- Feeling anxious and irritable
- Finding it hard to sleep at night even though you feel tired all the time
- Wanting to cry and feeling emotional
- Feeling out of control
- Finding it hard to switch off or feel calm
Sometimes it can feel really hard to cope with stress and it may make you feel like everything's getting on top of you and you may want to avoid the things that are causing you stress, for example, skip school or run away.
Coping with stress
- Try to talk to someone or express yourself in another way like writing, drawing or poetry
- Have a break
- Do something you enjoy
- Try to find what is causing you stress and think about how you can tackle it
- Sometimes trying new things can be hard and you may worry it might not work. Remind yourself "there is no harm in trying"
- Visit the Getting Help page and Staying Mentally Healthy
Feeling angry?
Everybody feels angry from time to time, this can often be caused by many of the same things that can make us feel stressed or worried. Anger can become a problem for some young people when it starts to happen a lot of the time and feels too strong to control. When anger is out of control it can lead to violence and aggression and cause you to do things that later you wish you hadn't. Anger can change the way you feel both in your body and your head and changes the way you think and act.
Anger in your body:
- Heart pounding and racing
- Tense muscles
- Clenched jaw or fists
- Getting hot and sweaty
Angry feelings in your head may include:
- Rage
- Irritable at the slightest thing
- Restless or on edge
- Feeling like you are about to explode
When you get angry you may act differently, like shouting, arguing, hitting or throwing things or being aggressive towards somebody else. Anger can cause us lots of problems and spoil some things for us, like friendships and relationships with adults that are close to us. It's normal to worry that anger will ruin things but the good news is that there are lots of things you can do to stop this happening.
Coping with anger
Let it out safely! Anger is like a fizzy drink - when we keep it inside us it gets shaken up and then explodes and makes a mess.
Ways to let anger out:
- Talking to someone
- Try drawing or writing about what is making you angry
- Doing some exercise like running or a circuit training class
It can help to try and stop angry feelings building up by finding ways to help you stay calm, like:
- Listening to some chill out music, read a book or watch some feel good TV
- Take some deep breaths and relax yourself
- Excuse yourself and leave the situation that is making you angry
For more advice visit the Getting Help page.
Feeling down or depressed?
Most of us have times where we feel sad and down but these feelings usually come and go depending on what is happening in our lives. For some people these feelings of sadness do not go away and they feel miserable for most of the time and it can stop them getting on with their everyday lives, this is sometimes called depression. Feeling down or depressed can be caused by lots of different things for example, family problems, getting disappointing results, feeling alone and problems with friends.
Young people who are depressed may feel really sad, gloomy and alone. If you are depressed you may also have a very negative view of yourself, your life and see your future as being very bleak, this is all part of depression and with the right help and support you will feel happy again.
Other things that people who are down and depressed may experience:
- Problems sleeping
- Eating more or less than usual
- Feeling that they can't be bothered with things and have no energy
- Feeling bad or guilty about things
- Problems concentrating and making decisions
- Feeling that sometimes there is no point to life and that things will turn out badly
Things that can help you to feel better:
- Trying to keep active
- Setting yourself small goals for each day
- Doing something you enjoy each day
- Make a feel-good playlist and listen to it when you are feeling down
- Talk to somebody
- Remind yourself that you will feel better soon
Self-harm?
Self-harm is deliberately injuring yourself so that you leave a mark, bruise, scar or bleed, or you take too much of a drug or substance that will cause you injury. The most common ways of self-harming are cutting, scratching, burning and hair-pulling but some people may use alcohol or drugs as a way of hurting themselves on purpose. Self-harm is probably more common than you think, approximately one in ten 15 and 16 years olds have self-harmed. It is something that is often not spoken about as people that self-harm often keep it secret and feel very ashamed and are sometimes embarrassed by any scars that they have.
There are many different reasons why people hurt themselves, like feeling bad because somebody has been treating them badly or feeling the need to relieve tension. Self-harm can also help some people to feel better and more in control in the short term but then it can cause them more worry in the long term. Self-harming does not mean that there is something seriously wrong with you and for many young people it has nothing to do with wanting to die.
Alternatives to self-harming:
- Squeeze ice
- Do something that will give you a sharp sensation like bite a lemon
- Snap a rubber band against your wrist
- Talk to someone who cares about you
- Draw or write on yourself with a red pen
- Do something nice for somebody else
- Play "the 15 minute game", tell yourself "I will not hurt myself for the next fifteen minutes" and then see if you can go another 15 minutes, then another, and so on
- Distract yourself by doing house chores or homework
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How to get help
Downloads
Download a young person's handbook, packed with useful information on a range of issues. (You will require Adobe Flash Player to view this handbook.)
Advice - The contents of this book are most suitable for adolescents. If you are under the age of 12 please ask for parental / carer permission before accessing this book.
